How can I tell if my daughter is a lesbian?

I am writing anonymously to protect myself and my friend. It doesn’t matter what your daughters sexuality is. You should love her, or you’ll lose her.

Let me tell you the story of one of my best friends of all time. I’m calling him Kyle. (I use that name because I’ve never met anyone by the name of Kyle, so I can protect his privacy and prevent anyone I know from suffering by this story.)

Kyle was one of my best friends for years. I knew he was gay for a long time, and I didn’t care. He’s a good person, and that was all that mattered to me.

I knew his mom damn near as well as I know my own mom, and I like to think they considered me as much a part of their family as I am of my own. In fact I know they did, they told me as much.

One day, his mom called and asked to talk to me. I was always happy to hear from her, it usually heralded a day of hanging out with Kyle. She told me she and Kyle had gotten into a huge fight, and I asked what about.

She told me that it was because he was gay. He’d disowned her and left. I was surprised to hear this, Kyle was pretty levelheaded. She told me she expected that he’d head to my flat and ask to crash there. She wanted me to tell him no so she could run him out of options and make him come back. (awful, right?)

I loved his mom, I really did. She was closer to me than some of my own relatives. But that was the last straw. I couldn’t support her. I still remember my exact words with perfect clarity, as if they just happened.

“Kyle can stay here as long as he likes, and you can fuck off. If you won’t accept him for who he is, you’re not welcome in my home.”

Kyle and his mother, (to my knowledge) never made up. He got the paperwork done, changed his name, moved to another town and never spoke to her again (again, it’s been a bit since I saw him last).

You tell me, would you rather have a gay daughter or no daughter at all? It’s up to you. I hope you can learn from Kyle’s mom’s mistake.